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Why We Need More Asexual Meetup Organisers – Asexualise Academy – Asexual Meetup Courses
If you have been part of my ACE community for some time, you will know, I am an asexual Author, Speaker, Trainer, and Coach. I am known as Asexualise, The Asexual Entrepreneur, or ACE Fibro Girl. Or by my birth name Sandra Bellamy, under Quirky Books, which is my own publishing imprint.
My expertise lies firstly, in spreading awareness of asexuality, particularly in context of real life situations. To make it more relatable and easy to understand. And secondly, in helping asexuals to become more comfortable and confident in themselves and with their asexuality. I do this by sharing my own life experience, knowledge, skills, and give you the tools you need to not just survive, but thrive, in this highly sexualised world. Both are equally important to me.
On July 8th, 2018, I was a speaker at the UK Asexuality Conference, in London. Giving a 49 minute talk about how to organise an asexual meetup for beginners. That talk is currently on my channel for free. Here https://youtu.be/RfcZJRaCLls
Did you know, on that same day, I also launched my Asexualise Academy. Which is the World’s First Online Training Centre And School, For Asexuals And Asexuality. It was a proud moment for both asexuality and me personally.
I have been organising and holding my own asexual meetups, for over 5 years now. I started in January 2015.
You can hear more about how that happened and how asexual meetups truly transformed my life, for the better, forever, https://youtu.be/bH5yKeE_ESI
Do not miss this!
Do you…
- Feel lost, lonely, and misunderstood?
- Feel like you have no support?
- Feel like friends, family, and those around you, just don’t get you?
- Feel isolated from other asexuals and cut off from them?
- Feel other asexuals are out of reach?
- Feel frustrated by the lack of asexuals near to where you live?
- Long to just meet another asexual in person or via video chat? But you don’t know how to go about making this happen? And you’re scared you’ll get it wrong!
Do you…
- Know asexuals that feel suicidal, because people in their immediate environment are not asexual, and they just don’t understand them. They feel invalidated. They feel bad about themselves and have low self-esteem. (Maybe this is you?)
- Know asexuals who are in a dark place and depressed state, with little hope the future? (Maybe this is you?)
- Know asexuals who feel like they don’t belong in this world? They feel like an alien who has lost their spaceship and can’t find their way home? (This was me, before I started organising and holding asexual meetups. It was a very lonely place to be.)
But… If You Ignore The Feeling Of Isolation, Of Disconnection, Of Emptiness, Of Loneliness, And Despair, It Just Gets Worse!
What most people do when feeling lonely, isolated, disconnection, or in despair, they talk to their friends, their family, their loved ones, a therapist, or a medical professional. But for most asexuals, none of that usually works.
- Many families don’t accept asexuality is real. Those that do accept it don’t fully understand it. (So you’re still left feeling lonely and misunderstood.
- Friends will often dismiss it, saying you just haven’t found the right person for you yet. (Making you feel misunderstood and invalidated.) Some friends will even feel so uncomfortable, that they change the subject. (And then you feel you can’t be yourself.)
- Loved ones may not even know you are asexual. They may be really hard to approach. It could cause confrontation. Those who do accept asexuality, and have an understanding towards you, still don’t fully understand asexuality, itself. (So you feel disconnected, alone, and miserable.)
- As you have seen from the counsellor I had, some therapists don’t accept asexuality and give really bad advice. They won’t even entertain the idea of asexuality, or encourage you to be yourself. Those who do accept it still don’t fully understand it. (So you know no matter what you say, they’ll never really get you. And the loneliness and pain just continues to build, as you’re deeply misunderstood.)
- Many medical professionals still don’t accept asexuality is real. They think there’s something wrong with your hormones, or your genitalia, or that it’s a result of trauma. Those who do accept it, still usually look at it with a clinical mind. So when you’re talking about your asexuality, they just sit there in deadly silence, and it’s that silence that says it all… (So you continue to feel isolated and in emotional pain.)
- Can you relate to any of these?Over the years, I’ve interacted with a number of different asexuals, and hands down, those who live a happier, satisfied, and so much more fulfilling life, are those who attend asexual meetups, and those who organise them.
This is because asexual meetups impact asexual lives in such a positive and meaningful way. That truly transforms their life. Here’s how…
- Asexuals gain understanding, that only comes from being with people of our own kind.
- Asexuals connect more deeply with other asexuals, because both in person and online meetups allow for that deeper connection, through flowing back and forth conversation, that you can’t get through messaging alone. And because more of the senses are involved. Such as sight. You can see them. You can see their body language, their mannerisms, and how they are in their own environment.
- The validation from being around asexuals increases confidence and self-esteem. As asexuality becomes more real – it’s solidified by seeing other ‘real life’ asexuals.
- Asexuals grow their support network of people whom they can talk to about asexuality and other things.
- Their isolation, loneliness, and despair, just disappears. As they have others who just ‘get’ them, naturally.
- They make asexual friendships for life. As well as a number of interesting acquaintances.
- The pressure to conform to social norms, just melts away, as everyone at the meetup is asexual, and on the same page with their understanding of one another, and of asexuality.
- The relief of being around people who want to be in your company and love and care about you for who you are, gives a massive boost to your self-esteem.
- The feeling of being in another person’s company, without the ulterior motive of sex, them wanting to jump your bones, or get in your pants, is vanished, in those moments with other asexuals. And that feels so good. It fosters a safe environment, were you can truly be yourself, thrive and flourish, in your own existence. As your beautiful asexual self, you were always born to be.
- In a highly sexualised world, it’s so comforting to know others feel the same way as you, and you are not alone. This in turns makes you feel so good and happy.
- Asexuals feel more positive about their asexual self, and life. While being around other asexuals, and staying connected to them.
- Having like-minded people to share your life and dreams with, gives you hope for the future.
I know what you may also be wondering. Why is this relevant to me?
Because we need more asexual organisers. Which are sadly lacking in numbers, as they are few and far between. This makes getting to one very difficult.
I have asexuals messaging me asking me to do meetups in their area, because they feel lonely, isolated, cut of from other asexuals (despite being in online asexual groups), and they are in a lot of emotional pain, distress and hurt.
But… I live in the UK, and there is only one of me. I can’t possibly get to all the places even in my own country. And it’s better to have someone who becomes a regular and familiar asexual meetup organiser face in their locality. This way they will feel more safer, stable, and confident, in returning to your meetups time and time again.
It’s a two-way street. If you yourself are in pain right now, because you have never met another asexual face-to-face on a video call or in person, now is the time to end that pain. And rather than talk about having no one in your area, you can organise asexual meetups and get people to travel to come to your own meetup.
Being an asexual meetup organiser, is the lifeline you can give to other asexuals and yourself.
If you want a different result in your life, you have to do something different and make the decision to just go for it, and become a meetup organiser. It’s up to you to end your suffering and pain! And I encourage you to help others to do the same.
Here are 3 reasons why mastering organising asexual meetups is an absolute must:
- Asexual meetups give asexuals a feeling of belonging, and of hope. They give them a sense of community, and make them feel like they are a part of something bigger. They give them something to look forward to. This works both ways. If you are feeling lonely or sad, because you aren’t around people of your own kind, it’s time to change that.
- Asexual meetups help to stop asexuals feeling suicidal, because they feel like no one understands them. They stop the loneliness and the pain, they give them a lifeline. Being a facilitator to that, will brighten up your own life and world, and make you feel so much happier that you were able to help others.
- Once you have these meetup skills, you have them for life. And never again, will you be able to say you can’t bring people together and you are lonely, because you will have all the skills, knowledge, tools and resources, to do just that, and organise any meetup you like.
There are many more reasons why mastering organising asexual meetups is a must, as you have seen from the points above.
That’s why I created How To Arrange A Successful Online Asexual Meetup and Asexual Meetup Mastery courses, on Asexualise Academy, To help you master all of the skills you need to be a professional and confident asexual meetup organiser, and get off to a flying start. With all the tools, resources, and skills, you will ever need, right at your fingertips, for life.
Asexual Meetup Mastery, which took me over 6 months to create, with over 70, almost 80 videos, besides bonuses and resources to download, also includes a MEGA BONUS right now – The entire, How To Arrange A Successful Online Asexual Meetup, course, as a FREE bonus. So that is two courses, for the price of the Asexual Meetup Mastery course.
If you want to hold both in person and online meetups, you need to get Asexual Meetup Mastery, now. 💜 Order Asexual Meetup Mastery here 👉https://courses.asexualiseacademy.com/course/details/asexual-meetup-mastery and get, How To Arrange A Successful Online Asexual Meetup course right now, as a FREE MEGA BONUS! 💜😍😍💜
If you only ever want to hold online meetups, you need to get, How To Arrange A Successful Online Asexual Meetup, course. 👉 From my Asexualise Academy course page here – https://courses.asexualiseacademy.com/course/details/how-to-arrange-a-successful-online-asexual-meetup 😍
Don’t miss out 😢 on this opportunity of a lifetime and a lifeline.
In the meantime, watch this video to find out – Why We Need More Asexual Meetup Organisers here, https://youtu.be/YRtE8fUBS58
Here are some of the comments in that chat conversation from that discussion on my channel:
Sam M Meet ups are good for having supportive people, and helping with self acceptance and understand yourself and the community.
Sam M Hey Nic.
Nic Betancourthey sam
Megan The Curse Oh, heya.
Sam M I am planning to start attending LGBT+ meet ups to meet other nonbinary folk, but I’ll mostly run ace ones myself most likely, but may branch out.
Sam M I can’t find many.
Megan The Curse That’s true
Nic Betancourt I think when you hang out with ace people online or offline there is just less pressure. Then real connections can happen
Watch when Disaster Strikes, My Asexual Story, here, https://youtu.be/bH5yKeE_ESI Do not miss this! The Earlybird offers advertised in this video have now gone. But at the moment, you can still Order Asexual Meetup Mastery course here 👉https://courses.asexualiseacademy.com/course/details/asexual-meetup-mastery and get, How To Arrange A Successful Online Asexual Meetup course right now, as a FREE MEGA BONUS! 💜😍😍💜 So don’t delay, order now, before I change my mind about this bonus.
As Always, stay Ace
Sandra xx
P.S. If you have any questions about these courses, just email me asexualise@gmail.com – I am only ever, an email away.
What Activities Do Asexuals Do At Asexual Meetups?
What Activities Do Asexuals Do At Asexual Meetups?
What Activities Do Asexuals Do At Asexual Meetups?
If you didn’t already know, I hold asexual meetups in my city of Exeter, in the UK. I hold both national ones where people come from all over the UK to them, as well as local ones. The furthest someone has travelled so far is from Newcastle and it took him 11 hours on a coach and that was just one way – yep, he had to do that going home too!
So if you are looking for asexual meetup ideas and to know what type of thing is on offer at an asexual meetup, what activities do asexuals do at asexual meetups?
On the 8thof September 2018, I had an asexual meetup in my city (incidentally, none of the people who came lived in my city and 2 stayed in hotels), and 4 of us went VR Gaming (Virtual Reality Gaming). In this video I go behind the scenes of me doing VR Gaming, which I absolutely loved! I went on to achieve the highest overall group score of 9300, and for someone like me, who does not do gaming, I was very proud of myself! One of my asexual friends who did gaming after me, filmed me live! Here is that video:
I am also super excited, because on Sunday 18thof November, I will be having another asexual meetup and we are meeting at midday for lunch and going for a meal at a beautiful Chinese restaurant in my city called Tang Shian and at 5pm it’s the Christmas light switch on, and there will be live bands outdoors and other activities on to celebrate and the Christmas Market is open! Other meetup organisers have included going to Christmas markets too, at their meets.
We ate at that Chinese Restaurant, we we’re going to this Sunday, last time we had a meetup in my city.
Previous meets in my city included going to for a tour around Exeter Underground Passages, going to the history museum and going to a Harry Potter theme style bar in my city. Exeter Cauldron Inn – Mugglers Bar. And here is someone doing a video tour of the whole place…
And many times we have met up for food, drink and chat, at a Wetherspoons pub, as they tend to cater to everyone’s dietary requirements.
And many times we have met up for food, drink and chat, at a Wetherspoons pub, as they tend to cater to everyone’s dietary requirements.
I know other meetups by other organisers have included trips abroad, picnics, a retro clothing shopping experience, movie and popcorn night, board games night, boat trips, and many other things. Different food and drinks outlets, such as restaurants, coffee shops, and other places, feature highly as favourite places to go to at many asexual meetups.
What asexual meetups have you been to, and what was your experience of them?
Until next time, stay ace!
Sandra xx
UK ASEXUALITY CONFERENCE HOW TO ARRANGE AN ASEXUAL MEETUP BY SANDRA BELLAMY – ASEXUALISE
So if you were unable to attend the UK Asexuality Conference on 8th of July 2018, I was a speaker there and this was my “How To Arrange An Asexual Meetup” talk for beginners, those who are just starting out arranging asexual meetups and who have never arranged one in their life. I think you will enjoy this talk very much. Any questions, please posts them in the comments below.
Thanks
Until next time, stay ace xx