Here is the first video (Asexual Relationships) from the Asexuality Conference UK. I was in a team 3 for this panel discussion and it is interesting to hear the varying viewpoints, and my short talk about Asexual Relationships starts about 03.48. My friend recorded this for me, and edited it for me. The person who introduces us did not want to be filmed, so you can only hear their voice and they have been cut out of any visuals.
I have noticed that a lot of asexuals feel alone and are lonely. I do understand this, especially as I am an extrovert asexual and like to get out and about and be around people about every 3 days.
I don’t usually feel lonely these days, but it can be isolating if I have not got out of my flat in a while! I like going out with friends and I am a social creature by nature, but I also have some introvert tendencies, in the sense that I enjoy my own company, like to switch off from the outside world now and then to explore and progress my creative pursuits and passions, and I also do a lot of solo work at home, building websites, writing blog posts, etc! Having said that, in-between doing my work, sometimes I will send an email reply to someone or reach out to someone via email, and I will often watch videos about my passions, which means I am still connected to people outside my home!
There are some huge benefits to being alone – I like to call it “being on my own and enjoying my own company”. The video above, has 10 reasons why it is good to be alone! Please watch it and let me know if you agree?
Until next time, stay ACE.
Sandra xx
If you are still learning about asexuality or wanting to understand your orientation better, I wrote a non-fiction book to show you the difference across the asexual spectrum. This book is not full of text book definitions, but a different take on asexuality, of real life asexuals, revealing some very intimate aspects of their life to help you! http://amzn.to/2FT0nJO
•Learn the asexual perspectives of Aromantics; Heteroromantics; Homoromantics; Panromantics; Grey Aces; Demi-sexual; Biromantic; Agender; Transgender; Polyamorous and many more.
•Uncover Asexuals’ deepest fears, concerns and worries about being asexual.
•Find out possible reasons why, in general, society does not accept asexuality as a sexual orientation in its own right and what we can do about this to change the world!
•Discover what asexuals really believe are the differences between sexual attraction, sexual desire and arousal.
•Find out what asexuals really think of nudity; porn; masturbation; BDSM and kinks.
•Discover what it feels like to have sex as an asexual and how to cope with the sexualized world that we live in.
•Find out what asexuals think about living together, about marriage and about having kids.
•Discover what an ideal asexual relationship would look like and whether asexuals believe a relationship with a sexual would be fair or not.
•Uncover the positives about being asexual.
•Find out what advice asexuals would give to a younger version of themselves regarding asexuality and what advice they would give to others who are just discovering they may be asexual.
Here is what some people are saying about the book:
“Thank You for writing this book! It is so important to bring awareness about asexuality. Thank you for interviewing so many people and helping the world understand more what asexual people stuggle with and what our lives can be like.”
“Excellent introduction to asexuality, and a great help to asexuals as well as people looking to understand asexuality!”
“I have not finished this book yet, but so far, I have found it so interesting and I can’t put the book down. As an Asexual, it’s so nice to not only see a well written book written about this orientation, but reading real life stories of people like me makes me feel good, because I know I am not alone and there are people who experience the same things I do. No one is the same, but we can all relate one way or another. I HIGHLY recommend this book to anyone who is interested in this topic, overall, it’s a good read! Thank you so much for writing this and a big thank you to everyone who shared their story! Truly inspirational!”
“I found this to be an easy read. Very informative with aspects of all different spectrums of the Asexual community. Being new to this community by just months and still trying to understand where I fit I was able to read different interviews and pick up things I had in common with those people. Helping me realize the more intricate parts of being an asexual woman. It helped me let go of many things that have hounded me for a very long time. I’m “mature” and there was no such thing when I grew up as “Asexual”. Thank you Sandra for putting your heart into this work. I will go back and refer to parts of this book on my own journey.”
Shop here http://amzn.to/2FT0nJO
In case you missed any of my Asexual Perspectives Awareness Month videos in July – here is the playlist for the whole 31 videos in the series. You will not be disappointed, they are really insightful and helpful in understanding how others feel about asexuality and being able to relate your own experiences to them.
And it all started because I felt singled out in the asexual community, but now I feel very much central to asexuality and to my mission of getting asexuality recognised as a sexual orientation throughout the globe, so that no asexual has to live in fear of ridicule ever again.
Until next time, stay ace
Sandra xx
Did you miss this?? #APAM Video One in my Asexual Perspectives Awareness Month series – A new video out every day for 31 days!!
Don’t miss any more, SUBSCRIBE http://www.youtube.com/c/asexualisemyasexuallife
Asexual Perspectives – Feeling Singled Out in the Asexual Community? We Should Celebrate Our Diversity!! #APAM When I was told by a member of Aven that I could not identify as a Heteroromantic Grey A, because I did not fit the ‘Grey A’ definition, I felt singled out. I had others private message me, that they were also told they could not identify themselves as they liked too. And that is what prompted me to write my Asexual Perspectives book, I thought we should be celebrating our diversity across the spectrum, not tearing each other apart. So in order to understand the huge spectrum of asexuals and the nature of asexuality more, and to bust through myths and stereotypes about asexuality, I thought we really need a book with a diverse range of asexuals all across the spectrum, to gain better understanding of the spectrum as a whole and celebrate our diversity!
SHOP FOR MY ASEXUAL PERSPECTIVES BOOK HERE http://amzn.to/2l8kppt
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Official channel Asexualise Your Asexual Life: Empower And Enhance Your Asexual Life. Giving Asexuals a voice in the world. It is my mission to give asexuals a voice in the world; to empower other asexuals to be comfortable and confident with their asexuality; and to give insight into my colourful asexual life, to enable others to better understand their own and to know they are not alone. I want to educate others about asexuality, so that in the future, all asexuals can live in society happily.
I am Sandra Bellamy. I identify as a Heteroromantic, Grey A, Asexual (younger) Cougar, who personally does not like sex, marriage or kids. I run the Asexual Business, Gurus and Entrepreneurs group and Facebook, that is an open group exclusively for asexuals – putting business and asexuality firmly on the map together. I have a strong business side to my nature and a quirky teenager/ kid side.
After painstaking months of working with the typesetter on my Asexual Perspectives book from January until around the end of March/beginning of April, and still having typesetting issues that needed to be sorted, and having spent another 3 nights last week, working on all those issues, I am relieved that I could finally print this final 560 page book proof, before I order a copy to check from Amazon, so I can finally hit the publish button to the world. Not long to go now… I cannot wait to hold this book in my hand!!
I must have edited it well over 15 times, considering all the editing I did prior to the typesetting, and it has gone through a final proof read and edit these past two days, and I am doing the typing up of those as we speak. I love writing but all the book formatting stuff is tough!!
Making a full-time living out of writing, is my dream, and my hugest passion is for asexuality, I really want to write more books for asexuals, as this is my huge specialist niche and I truly believe that I am born to get asexuality recognised as a sexual orientation in its own right throughout the globe, so that no asexual have to live in fear of ridicule ever again. The more people who buy, share, like, and give good reviews for this Asexual Perspectives book, the more that will help with this. I really need more amazing reviews, so when you get a copy, please could you leave one? It will really help me out!! Thank you!!
With 560 pages of insights into asexuality and how asexuals survive in a sexualised world; how they manage their relationships, and busting through many asexual myths and stereotypes about love, live and sex; including arousal and masturbation, it will be an intriguing read and answer many questions you may have about asexuality that are constantly on your mind, causing you confusion and frustration! It is told in the voices of 46 different asexuals around the globe, using their own language, dialects, slang and mannerisms! As well as my own. It took me almost a year to interview for it; write/edit it, so you are getting more book for your buck!! It is not only educational, but humorous too!!
Until next time, check out the Kindle Version and stay ace! xx
UPDATE: Asexual Perspectives Print Edition is out now and you can buy it here https://amzn.to/2Pl6aJd
